No one in Britain ever really said vacation, but somehow someone decided that a staycation was a thing. That person should be put on a permanent wallyday. Luckily, some splendidly clever chaps have come up with a new way to spend your summer downtime and it's called affraycation.
You pile into a van with your mates, go somewhere nice like Sunderland, throw some bricks at coppers, smack a few British people who look different to you, and the lovely police service will give you a free room for the night. AirBNP.
'I'm not being racist, but if anyone says hollybobs, you can lamp 'em in the hijab,' said a racist.
A leading tour operator named after someone called Timmy or something has cornered the market and is now offering shittybreaks. And R&R now stands for Rage and Rioting.