Tory policy wanks have come up with a new solution to 13 years of Tory NHS underfunding, which is 15 more years of Tory NHS underfunding, but now spread out across more staff.
‘It’s wonderful, beautiful even’ said one ‘Nurses will continue to be underpaid and overstretched, but now they’ll be under qualified as well. If we can hire them faster than they leave, there might be slightly more of them though. It’s probably nothing to worry about, because Rishi will be long gone by then, as will this plan. Let’s be honest, the only place the Tories want to see the NHS in 15 years is the history books, because it’s been sold to big American pharmaceutical companies.’
‘What’s the matter? You look a little pale... Nurse? Nurse!’
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