A relentless cybernetic killing machine has been arrested following a 437-vehicle pile-up at a roundabout outside Wigan.
Police were soon on the scene and managed to stop the Terminator from throwing a motorist through the windscreen of his burning car. According to witnesses, it followed a heated dispute about insurance details.
'I rumbled him as a cyborg assassin straightway,' said Traffic Officer Nick Edwell. We initially thought it was a bad case of road rage; then, I noticed the motorcycle jacket and a pair of sunglasses. I mean, no one in Wigan owns a pair of sunglasses.'
‘A fellow officer started talking to him, and he replied in a weird Austrian accent. So we roughed him up a bit and took him down the station, which he promptly decided to blow up. Talk about a sense of entitlement. Anyway, that should get him at least six points on his license.'