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Sausages are actually Keir Starmer’s plan for Middle East peace

A recent speech has suggested that Keir Starmer has got sausages on the brain, but only because he intends to use the humble banger to bring peace to the Middle East.


Surprisingly, Liz Truss announced support for Starmer’s plan, noting that she had opened several pork markets.


Labour intern Jodie Johnstone said 'The plan is to have talks with the Israelis and Palestinians and when it’s lunchtime, Keir will tuck into a big plate of sausages, while they both look at him dumbfounded. "Check out that guy eating pork" one will say. "Not cool" the other will reply. They’ll see they have so much in common that the Nobel Peace Prize is basically guaranteed.'


'Bangers and mash is the real two state solution.'


Ed Miliband reportedly looked at a bacon sandwich, but decided not to risk it.


image from pixabay

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