top of page
Writer's pictureDoctor Chutney

Porton Down fined for creating unhealthy workplace


Porton Down, the science and defence technology campus in Wiltshire, has been fined after health and safety inspectors left with a damning report, not to mention fever, headaches and vomiting.



In their report they state that they found employees constantly off sick with a variety of ailments. This seems to be down to a workplace culture, which was found growing successfully in a petri dish in the staff room fridge. There were a number of seizures.



An anonymous researcher confirmed they were plagued by health and safety regulation. “Only the other day I fell foul of a body fluid spill regulation. Honestly, I had tissues to hand.”



A senior official at Porton Down told us they couldn’t comment as they had a throat infection, so at this stage it is unclear who is going to cough up for the fine.


Recent Posts

See All
bottom of page