After Pyongyang admitted a ballistic missile silo had been disguised by placing it inside a golf course, engineers revealed a series of failsafes have been incorporated into the grounds to prevent an accidental launch.
'It's quite simple'" one of the technicians told us. 'To launch a missile, you have to be standing on the eighteenth tee and score a hole-in-one. Given that the hole is over 500 yards long, it should be impossible for anyone to do this other than the Supreme Leader. After all, his father hit five aces on his first ever round, so it only stands to reason that his son, who's an even bigger golfing prodigy, should find such a distance facile.'