Deskpilot has started 2025 where he left 2024 off - at the top of the leaderboard. Nicka is pushing hard, but Deskpilot's 29 headlines is a tough act to beat if that was all he produced, but add in 5 front pages and 11 News in Brief...
All in all a good start to the New Year. As usual the Cartoon of the month and the full list of headlines are posted under the leaderboard and links to the month's subs.
Front Page, News in Brief and Features
billclay
Chipchase
ChrisF
Deskpilot
Dominic_mcg
eppursimuove
FlashArry
ian searle
Jack the Quipper
James_Doc
jeremynh
Jim Skinz
McDabble
Midfield Diamond
Nicka
Sully
Sydalg
tacitus
Throngsman
Titus
Tonymc
Wrenfoe
Cartoon of the month goes to Lockjaw for An online purchase error in France
Headlines
Adrian Bamforth
Alan Bates told his knighthood is in the post
apepper
Inventor of ultra-velcro said it was "hard to pull off"
Teenage boys rush to Scotland after lynx released
benvoleo
Nigel Farage to have his arms firmly stapled to his sides
bigbadbob
Dual Carriageway to be built around the town of Coronary
Rules change for online porn leads to surge in fake IDs
billclay
Farage distances himself from Robinson, but still admires Yaxley-Lennon
In deference to Trump, Judge gives poorly constructed sentence
JFK Assassination files recovered from Trump’s bathroom
The old “I’m innocent as I drive a gold Land Rover defence” may not be enough this time
ChrisF
Nick Clegg contract has Meta untimely end
Deskpilot
Agnostic vicar didn't have a prayer
Air parts manufacturer finds business is really taking off
Americans still think burglarizing is a word
Australian tailor is making great strides
Bogus chiropractor was just pulling my leg
Busy manx cat worked his tail off
Clumsy puppeteer drops a clanger
Criminal who represented himself doesn't do himself justice
Custard pies - do they strike you as funny?
Elon Musk arranges Keir Starmer's Xecution
Embalmer shows off extensive body of work
Evans leaves Strictly - no Wynne, no fee
Facebook unfriends Nick Clegg
Fish enthusiast makes scale models
Government hails massive increase in UK snow production
Harry gets his day in the sun
If you dress up as a lettuce, is it cosplay?
Indecisive balloonist leaves things up in the air
Knight in shining armour offers iron-clad guarantee
Liz Truss adamant that the economy crashed into her
Nervous chemist won't brave the elements
Plans for new Christopher Robin book pooh-poohed
Pretty chiropractor is turning heads
Roman baths expert accused of being a hypocaust denier
Trump absolutely rules out buying the Isle of Wight
Trump fails to stop war in Ukraine in one day
Trump pardons Elon Musk, just in case
Trump says climate activists will be burnt at the stake
Trump's hair unprepared for air crash briefing
Dick Everyman
Mount Rushmore not big enough for Trump’s head
Trump proposes Palestinians relocate to Greenland
Docholiday
Alcoholic boxer on the ropes
Local Church seeks Organ Donor
Man on the road to recovery gets run over
dominic_mcg
Reeves backs 3rd Heathrow runway. Mortimer not convinced
eppursimuove
Los Angeles fire alert status upgraded to “Whoa, dude”
Luke Littler - If I win, I’ll stop cutting my own hair
Space between Trump’s ears renamed Gulf of America
Granger
Ukraine shud of surrendered - GO F@£K yourself, Fat Orange
hughdwink
Musk Proposes Apartheid
Trump blames nighttime Washington air crash on nighttime
Trump to seize Stonehenge
ian searle
Police say they believe the star of a one man play was acting alone
Jack the Quipper
Americans still think burglarizing is a word
David Lynch dies at 78 - Autopsy to last 3 seasons
Trump Makes America Gross Again
jim Skinz
Supermodels call for third runway at London Fashion Week
Wealthy white South African male might be a bit racist shock
Winner of Locomotive Driver Of The Year says he's well chuffed
Lockjaw
Tragically, beached whale is all washed up
lostandflounder
Car-parts manufacturer set for bumper year
mcdabble
Barnsley remote worker forced to come into office, shocked to find its in Singapore
mcdabble
Biden fears trumped-up charges
Greenland offers to sell Denmark
Home Secretary Yvette Cooper to have a 'very strong word' with smuggling gangs
LA residents regret using Tinder
Labour worried they may lose the grooming vote
Mancunians celebrate coming first in the police speeding figures
Melania releases range of kiss-proof hats
Porn to Bishop too
Putin implies he will only talk peace to cowards
Reeves asks faith groups to pray for the UK economy
UK commits to spending 5% of GDP on sarcasm over next four years
Midfield Diamond
US finally gets irony as Trump opposes fact hunts
Modelmaker
Congress revolts as Trump slaps 25% tariffs on their cocaine suppliers
Crematorium schedule disrupted by late MP’s hearse
Elon Musk buys Arsenal to piss Keir Starmer off
New year warning over Chinese air fryers
Recently discovered Unity Mitford diaries confirm Hitler had only one ball
Tory press more excited than at the height of Tulip Mania in 1637
MrQ
Bradford double check it's not April 1st after being awarded City of Culture
Breaking: All strawberries to be unseeded at this year's Wimbledon
Distance runner looks really small
Evangelical Church boom sees prophets go through the roof
Gardener put on gardening leave feels a bit hard done by
Government not afraid to make roofless cuts to housing costs
Israel sneaking in a few strikes before last orders
Just Stop Oil pull off slick protest
Labour hope Artificial Intelligence can replace Actual Incompetence
Man barges his way in to waterfront conference
Man loses bargaining chip to seagull
Record number of Royal Mail staff suffering post traumatic stress
Study shows people that drink more coffee buy more coffee
Sweeping sanctions leave Russian broom industry in tatters
TikTok ban just second hand news
Trump and Musk prove two wrong 'uns do make an extreme right
Truss sends cease and desist lettuce to Starmer
rogerg
Nicola Sturgeon finally achieves independence
sinnick
Chagos - with or without the "g" ?
US celebrates Martin Luther King Day by electing misogynist, racist, climate-denying felon as POTUS
Spa99ers
Lake containing high levels of sewage to be renamed Musk Water
Titus
Edinburgh charges storm Eowyn £5 for visiting the city
Govt. calls for inquiry into gangs of foreign billionaires grooming UK politicians
HMS Agincourt renamed HMS Hastings to please the Normans
Peter Mandelson apologises for saying what he REALLY thinks of Donald Trump
Report of Tory party membership numbers described as a conservative estimate
Russel Brand denies intention of applying for job as a bishop