The London Mayor’s office had egg on its face today when an intern accidentally read out a document marked “For internal office use only” during a press conference.
The document, drawn up to mark the one year anniversary of the ULEZ zone, revealed that the scheme had been “every bit as lucrative as we’d hoped”.
It went on to detail how the revenue was divided almost equally between people paying the charge, and the fines levied if they forgot. It also revealed a third stream of income, backhanders from car dealers whose business went through the roof as those who could afford to rushed to trade in older cars for recent models that meet the ULEZ standard.
It was only when he came to the phrase “Though obviously what we announce to the public should be about pollution, air quality and all that bollocks” that the intern realised his mistake.
“There appears to have been some confusion,” smarmed the Director of PR, as the intern cleared his desk in the background. “Let me reassure you, our only goal in creating the ULEZ zone was the improvement of public health. Just think how much healthier the poor will be now they have to walk everywhere.
”Besides, it’s vitally important we ease congestion in central London. Even with limits set at 20mph, how are we going to make any money from speed cameras unless the traffic flows a bit faster?”
final grade calculator We understand the requirement of time, as today students need to be multi-tasking and their life is filled with several goals to achieve.