There was amusement today in the High Court during Mr Justice Bufton-Tufton’s summing up in the case of Rex vs Sawdust.
'Being unable to resolve your differences in a civilised manner, you then resorted to fisticuffs,' said the judge, before looking up to see where the ill-disguised snorts of laughter had come from.
'I’m sorry, m’lord,' smirked Counsel for the Prosecution Sir Timothy Shirehorse, 'but it does sound very funny when you say that word.'
'What, fisticuffs?' asked the judge, causing another outbreak of mirth. This prompted a furious reaction from the judge, who threatened to hold anyone else who laughed in contempt of court.
'Anyone else feel like a giggle?' he asked, prowling around the courtroom. 'What about you, stenographer? Do you find it… wisible… when I say the word… fisticuffs?' The stenographer just about managed to keep a straight face and shake his head.
'I must admit, I love it when he gets the affray cases,' said DI Steve Concrete afterwards. 'You just know he’s gonna say it. But it’s so hard not to laugh. I have to make sure I don’t catch the Chief Super’s eye, or else we’ll both be off.'
For his part, the judge said he didn’t understand all the fuss about a word that was perfectly commonplace at Eton in the 1920s.
'Next they’ll be saying that describing someone as a ‘rum old cove’ is outdated.'
Picture credit: Wix AI (Judge in a wig - still hilarious)