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Harder to vaccinate Russians against COVID than Ukrainians against NATO, says Putin



“Your Pfizer vaccine has a mind-control chip added to it? That's nothing! Ours has a f**king radio-transmitting satellite. Imagine the bleeding hole that would make in your shoulder!” said concerned Russian social-media user Olga. “No wonder our glorious leader wouldn’t show himself on TV getting his Sputnik.”


Her vaccine scepticism is more widespread in Russia than it is in western democracies. Recent news suggests that despite lower official figures, a million Russians have died of covid rather than trust a needle containing a symbol of national pride from a kleptocratic government.


Vladimir Putin commented: “Yes it’s a pity a majority of Russians chose to be unvaccinated, but they didn’t choose me either, so what do I care. Anyway, there are easier ways to bolster our population statistics than creating a trustworthy government. Did you know there are 41 million people living in the parts of the Ukraine we haven’t invaded yet?”


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