A copy of a letter from Nigel Farage to Rishi Sunak has been leaked:
Dear Rishi,
I've been very disturbed to hear that a foreigner is being allowed to drive a sleigh into our sovereign lands and abuse the sanctity of our chimneys, which were designed for boys to climb up with sweeping brushes not for fat men to climb down with toys. I would therefore like to insist that we introduce a bill that would intercept these sleighs over the North Sea and send this Santa bloke to Rwanda, while his presents would be confiscated and distributed to the children of my dear friend Boris. We will also ban any teaching about people who weren't British so unfortunately that means Xmas will be permanently canceled until Jesus comes back as an Englishman and Mary is discovered to have been a secret cockney who got lost while on a knees-up in Benidorm.
Yours,
Nige.
A copy of a letter from Farage directly to Santa has not yet come to light.
Author: satchmo76
Image: Newsbiscuit