Nine minutes after launching on its latest test flight, Elon Musk's starship project experienced an anomaly, causing a huge metaphor to occur over the Atlantic Ocean.
Engineers are still piecing together data, with initial investigations showing it's likely the loss was caused by the conjunction of an allegory and a parable, or possibly a symbolism overload.
Speaking at the launch site in Texas, flight controller Emerald Minor gave waiting reporters and members of the Muskovites an update, saying, 'The flight was proceeding to plan until separation, when we had a rapid unscheduled disassembly of the booster caused by build issues, and a hugely expensive self-destruction of the main Starship vehicle prompted by an illogical decision.'
She continued, 'SpaceX are taking active measures to prevent metaphors to other ventures undertaken by our illustrious leader occurring in subsequent launches. As such, we have asked Elon to not attend the next flight in case it blows up in his face, reinforcing the launch pad to avoid an expensive black hole, and we will be keeping Jewish members of the team away from him at all costs; though we've actually been doing that for years.'
Elon Musk could not be reached for comment as he was busy trying to get strangers on the internet to think he's a really cool and funny guy.
image from pixabay