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Writer's pictureWrenfoe

Drug test says 'no', purple face says 'hmmmmm'


US swimming officials have been left anything but red faced, after all their team ended up looking like Violet Beauregarde. Out of all the alchemists, only the US has managed to turn purple into gold.



Glowing with purple pride, their winning swimmers insisted that there was nothing illicit going on and they were not sponsored by Ribena. Chuckled one Olympic official: 'It would be a bit ironic to create an undetectable drug, only to discover it had one very obvious side effect.'



Maybe it is an allergic reaction to water or a novel litmus test, either way the US have overcome adversity for a massive medal haul. 'We wear our heart on our sleeve and our purple heart on our face.'


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