Staff recruitment shortages will be filled with tenuous plot devices and an endless supply of Dr. Who’s and their companions. The Government has said it will also look into the feasibility of accessing the Fountain of Youth and an 18th level healing Cleric from Dungeons & Dragons™.
The Health Minister said: ‘We’ll plug these gaps with Deus ex machina. Kingsfoil from Lord of the Rings. DNA from Captain Scarlet. Even Unicorn’s blood at a pinch. In a fictional multiverse replete with all manner of cures, why do we need to fund the NHS? I saw a documentary where this Doctor chappy regenerated into a girly Doctor – and at no expense to the taxpayer. Can’t we just do that?’
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