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Donald Trump's Medical Report, by Dr Seuss


Under pressure from Kamala Harris, who has released medical reports showing that she is in excellent health, Donald Trump has followed suit.  His medical report, prepared by his personal physician, Dr Seuss, is as follows:


   His face is shiny


Tears are briny


   Outlook whiny


   Hands are tiny



   His brain is fine


   As good as mine


   His temperature


   Is ninety-nine



   His hair is fair


   I have to share


   His head is bare


   It’s not his hair



   Oh, what a man


   Oh, what a plan


   His face is like


   Green eggs and ham



   He has a heart


   He is a fighter


   I wish he’d do


   His tie up tighter



   His conscience clear


   He has no fear


   He has a hole


   In his right ear



   His skin’s not great


   As you have seen


   It’s an odd shade


   Of tangerine



   His skin is like


   A wrinkled peach


   Or one that’s soaked


   In too much bleach



   At seventy-eight


   His mental state


   Is not so great


   Covfefe, mate



   And so for my


   Enormous fee


   I promise that


   He’s problem free.


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