After Rishi Sunak's announcement, a team of philosophers and dustmen are working on the best way to dispose of the unused bins.
A spokesman explained, 'As you know, before Sunak (BS) we had seven bins and these were used for metal, food, plastic, cardboard, clothing, government pledges and broken Brexit dreams.'
The government has released guidance suggesting that food and cardboard can be combined as by 2028 they'll be the same thing anyway, having clothing to recycle will be a distant dream, so that won't be necessary. Finally, the plastic bin should be put into itself for recycling.