In a fit of pique, Channel 4 has stomped off to its room and is refusing to come out for the next four years. Distraught at the US Election result the channel has refused to listen to any and all appeals for it to come back and play.
“It’s not fair. It’s just not fair!” could be heard as it rejected all entreaties. BBC1 admitted it did its best, but feeling pretty low itself gave up and headed for the nearest wine bar.
A spokesperson reassured fans of the channel that it would be back. “I’m sure we can entice it out if we promise to change our daytime favourite show to Countdown To Doomsday.”