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Writer's pictureWrenfoe

Cap removed on bankers' arseholery


The government has taken the decision to open their Pandora's Box of Greed again, and let Satan's little helpers run riot. Said one starving child: 'They've been struggling to get by on shop brand champagne. I don't know how they coped.'


Left to their own devices bankers have all the self-control of a fox in a KFC. One bemused homeless individual quipped. 'You mean those multi-million pound contracts, were them showing restraint?!?'


An economist explained: 'It's all part of the financial cycle. Bonuses, followed by the collapse of civilization. We bail them out. Then we give them a bonus to try again. It's complicated. Not everyone gets it. I could show you diagrammatically, but it would just be a picture of you being repeatedly rogered with a bollard.'


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