Fans are not optimistic about the longevity of either appointment, given how shambolic their teams are and their insistence that the only winger is a right winger. The situation is not helped by the long list of previous failures, with Rishi Sunak losing the general election to a man with all the charisma of Kettering Town FC.
Known respectively as the Red Devils and the Blue C$nts both have struggled to win. Bookies have suspended betting on the distinct possibility that they are sacked simultaneously, by playing Kemi as centre forward.
One Tory insisted they would be lucky to get a mid-table finish, while Utd fans said they would be happy just to win a by-election in Chelsea.
As someone sagely observed: 'The only guarantee is that neither will be getting into Europe any time soon.'
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