Assisted Suicide to be combined with Epstein Witness List
- Wrenfoe
- 4 hours ago
- 1 min read
A Minister explained that this was a clear cost saving: 'Rather than an expensive termination, we will outsource the work to the security services. They've an established track record of providing quick and painless deaths – look what they did to the BBC's reputation.'
He allayed concerns that the NHS would be replaced by an American provider such as the CIA, insisting the whole operation would be British – a cross between James Bond and Harold Shipman. 'It also injects a sense of surprise to your ending. You might be dying of cancer, but MI5 could make it look like a mysterious car accident or that you were bitten by a exotic snake. You'll get an untraceable death and beforehand you'll get to sleep with a Royal of your choice. What's not to like?'
While there is a waiting list for the new service, he said patients could get fast-tracked: 'Just by hinting that Bill Gates had grabbed their boob.'
