With news that the Altar Stones, previously believed to have originated 'just across the border' in mid Wales have actually come from North East Scotland, many archaeologists are trying to work out how the stones, weighing several tonnes, were transported. Brendan, an ardent anti-vaxxer, believes he knows how they did it.
'For starters they didn't weight several tonnes back then,' he said today, 'the metric system is a false way of measuring stuff like large stones and didn't exist back then. The Neolithics didn't even have pounds and ounces and weren't taken in by 'weighist' propaganda,' he insisted.
'Also, although the route looks difficult, taking in the Grampian Hills and the Pennines it is worth noting there aren't any maps from that period showing the existence of these hills. It's clearly a conspiracy by the Ordnance Survey to make Britain, and by extension the planet, to not look flat,' he insisted.
'But honestly, why would anyone bother carrying the stones that distance when the obviously cyclical nature of sea levels suggests most of what we call the UK was underwater back then - show me a map that contradicts that fact - and the good stone movers merely floated the stones to Wiltshire, dammed the local rivers to raise the water level on the Stonehenge site and floated the stones to the top of the vertical supports. Show me one piece of evidence that contradicts this I say,' he added.
Brendan, who doesn't belief Covid is a thing, that JFK was killed by a lone gunman or that man has set foot on the moon also doesn't believe in Liz Truss. 'No way she was Prime Minister, what kind of fool do you take me for?' he asked.
Image: Wix AI
Definitely Altered Stones