HBO releases The West Wing - The Biden Years

It was announced today that HBO will release a sequel to award-winning political show The West Wing, focussing on the years of “Grandpa” Joe Biden’s presidency.

Writer Aaron Sorkin’s heavy cocaine use has often been cited as the reason for the fast-talking intellectual brilliance of the original show. It’s thought he’s now taking ketamine to help him reproduce Joe Biden’s speech patterns.

'There was scene in the West Wing where the president accidentally took two different pain meds when he was supposed to take one or the other, and became dazed and incoherent as a result,” explained Sorkin. “So now I just have to write the whole show that way.'

'The Biden Years will contain just as many witty and quotable lines as the original,' an HBO executive reassured reporters today. “'n fact, even though the show hasn’t officially been released, the scene where Biden assembles his staff and tells them ‘We gotta beat Medicare… the number of people, so many people… I just can’t believe… they never even… is it Tuesday today?’ has already become a viral internet sensation.'

It’s not known what new elements they plan to introduce for the second season, though the title of the first episode is said to be “The 25th Amendment”.

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TV crime suspect tricked again into saying something other than 'no comment'

A suspect in a TV crime drama has once again capitulated from his initial stance of responding to every question with a smarmy 'no comment' and has admitted to a range of offences under mild questioning.

The incident, thought to be the 3,625th of its kind this year, happened nearly two thirds of the way through an episode of Vera, with experts noting that it seemed to follow the same pattern as every other interrogation scheme in every sodding Detective show.

'These cases all seem to follow a similar timeline. Its the speed of the capitulation by fellow cons that is a worry here', noted Mickey 'Mad Mike' McBride, head of Grifting at Crooks R Us.

'Always the same. A couple of confident 'no comments' to a direct accusation from a know-it-all TV detective, delivered with a wry smile, arms folded, with a casual lean back in the chair.', continued McBride. 'Usually accompanied by some supportive nods and note taking from their brief.'

'But then, there's a follow up question suggesting the cop has some new piece of evidence, or that they can negotiate some time for the suspect to talk with their estranged wife and son, and bang, they just totally spill the beans', noted McBride.

McBride has called for a radical overhaul of police-suspect dialogue, with TV crime suspects expected to deliver at least 20 'no comments' before giving in, preferably alongside some sarcastic slow handclaps at the wacky but actually correct theories of the detective.

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