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Rejected titles for Liz Truss' book



1. All Trussed up and nowhere to go


2. It Kwasn't me


3. Number 10 and others I can count to


4. Pork Markets: A beginners guide


5. Oops what am I like?


6. I, robot


7. Economy 111


8. I am Frumparella


9. How to achieve the Thousand Yard Stare in five easy stages.


10. Cognitive Dissonance: the Early Years


11. All's well that ends


12. 10 Chapters to Save My Career


13. Never Mind What I Did, What About China eh?


14. Bhodi Liz's Journey To The Occident


15. You Need To Hear From Me Again. Yes You Do.


16. Chief Executive, or Lord High Executioner. Reasons why I didnt bring back Hanging, for financial mismanagement



Contributions from and hat tips to: Lockjaw, Deskpilot, Sirlupus, Rowly

A few more snippets from NB archives




1912. Guardian leads with "Rare Endangered Iceberg Feared Damaged After Collision With Ship".


1933. Austrian immigrant overcomes prejudice and bigotry to become Chancellor of Germany.


1936. Edward VIII forced to abdicate in favour of brother after Bank of England accidentally puts George's face on 1,000,000,000 pound notes.


1938. Neville Chamberlain describes meal he shared with Hitler. "Peas in our thyme" remark widely misunderstood.


1939. Berlin branch of WH Smith notes sharp rise in sale of Polish phrasebooks.


1940. French become Surrender Champions of Europe and hold title for four years running.


1945. Führexit.


1945. Surviving residents of Nagasaki reassured to know sudden spike in temperature not due to climate change.


1956. Busload of bewildered Dynorod men stranded in Egypt due to "sewers crisis" mixup.


1960. Unbanning of Lady Chatterley fuels huge rise in demand for rough rural sex. Harold Macmillan tells gamekeepers: "You've never had it so good".


1969. In US, millions burn draft cards to avoid being sent to moon. On landing, Armstrong utters famous words, "It's grim up here but at least it's not Vietnam".


1980. Millions turn out to celebrate election of first Geriatrican-American president.


2001. "Three-point turn" to replace "Dodge the Twin Towers" in test for Saudi pilot licence.


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