Hostile Homes Under The Hammer with Robert Jenrick

Many soon-to-be-unemployed Tory MPs are looking for jobs with impotent rage factory GBNews. Taking a slightly different approach however is happiness hoover Robert Jenrick, who is fronting a new right-wing daytime property show.

Each episode sees Jenrick and his team of joy killers visit a nicely decorated family home in a Labour or Lib Dem area and turn it into a hostile environment for adults as well as children.

One crew member said 'We obviously paint over the kids' rooms. Then we smash the place up, basically. Destroy the furniture, maybe leave a sofa on fire in the garden. Leave trailing wires and leaking pipes - always a great combo. Basically a proper Bullingdon blow out.'

At the end of each episode, Jenrick drops his catchphrase 'Unwelcome to your home!' and the family gets deported to Rwanda.

Image: https://pixabay.com/users/quincecreative-1031690/

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At the Reichsmarshall Jenrick Migrant Child Reception Centre

Tory planning system change will lead to new homes in flood zones

A radical blueprint put forward as a "once-in-a-generation reform" from the government has the aim of sweeping away "slow and complex" planning laws.

The shake-up, a central part of the prime minister's "build, build, build" agenda, includes automatic planning approval for new homes on land earmarked for growth, however low-lying. The revolution is published in a government consultation paper, Planning For The Future, pushed by Housing Secretary Robert Jenrick just weeks after he became embroiled in a planning row.

The changes come after record donations from housebuilders to Conservative Party funds. House building companies wil make up a large portion of the representatives on the planning boards. There are no plans to include climate scientists in those decisions.

A spokesman for a green campaign group said "We fear the plans will lead to new builds that have to be abandoned in just a few decades due to sea level rise. Some of the likely build zones are in extremely dangerous coastal areas, like for example Norfolk or London."

The Labour Party have said they intend to sink this bill at the earliest opportunity.