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Angry French protestors have taken to the streets of Bordeaux after the government imposed a rather indifferent pot-au-feu that may have been over seasoned. Cars were set alight and buildings ransacked as furious pensioners demanded a simple but rather delicious confit de canard.
A spokesperson said: ‘Macron is forcing Pinot Noir down our throats, and it tastes a bit corked. We've had an œuf.' The French government is asking people to emulate British protestors by staying at home and watching episodes of Isle d'amour instead.
An angry British tourist whose holiday was disrupted by the protests said: ‘I am absolutely incandescent with rage. Why isn’t somebody else doing something about it?’
The FBI recently retrieved various documents from Donald Trump’s Florida residence, Mar-a-Lago. These included files on the French President, Emmanual Macron. Hackers claim to have accessed these files and have uploaded the contents on the website WackyLeaks.
Here is an extract from the top secret research – allegedly -
My notes on Emmanuel Girly Name Macron
1. He is named after a cake, who does that?
2. He has nice hair – must ask him about that
3. He likes to eat frog’s legs, but not frog balls or other frog parts
4. Doesn’t eat freedom fries
7. Likes wine – maybe take him some Californian Zinfandel?
5. His supporters wear yellow vests – must be a fashion thing
8. Submarines are a difficult subject. Don’t eat a ham and cheese sub in front of him.
9. Calls the English channel ‘the sleeve’ for some reason
10. Tough on asylum seekers - sends them all to the UK
9b. His party is called En Marche, which means In the Swamp
Image: flutie8211 | Pixabay
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