top of page
Search
Residents in Richmond have been told to expect extra bin collections in the week the election is to be held. A member of the council told Newsbiscuit this was not going to put extra strain on council finances as it was being paid for by central government.
Opposition parties and Commie journalists are claiming this is an obvious bribe to take votes away from Labour and the Lib Dems, however our political correspondent has pointed out that Count Binface always stands in the seat occupied by the Prime Minister, so if that bin gets emptied, Sunak may win the few votes he needs that Binface would take from him and be able to cling on.
image from pixabay
Friday, May 31
Visit to skate park. Make sure he's wearing a helmet and knee and elbow protectors.
Monday, June 3
Visit to climbing wall centre. Make sure he only goes on the kiddies' section
Tuesday, June 4
Visit to go-kart centre. Make sure he only goes on the child circuit. No racing with anyone. It may cause him to crash.
Wednesday, June 5
Bouncey Castle World. We should be OK with this one, but make him wear a helmet anyway.
Thursday, June 6
Waterslide. Have a frogman on standby. He is bound to fall in.
Friday, June 7
Tandem Skydiving. TANDEM SKYDIVING!!. Are you sh*tting me. How did that get in there? Cancel immediately.
Image by manseok Kim from Pixabay
bottom of page