Jeremy Clarkson nearly bought the farm

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Shock as medical procedure reveals Jeremy Clarkson has a heart

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‘Mexico? They’ll probably want to call it Mexica now’ fumes sexist

A conspiracy theory that Mexico will change its name to Mexica, having recently elected a female President for the first time, has been accidentally concocted by a rancid sexist, who could barely point to Mexico on a map. 

‘Why are the changing the name? I’m just asking legitimate questions?’ said Derek Drummond, who has asked no legitimate questions, particularly of himself, since his divorce.

Drummond, who considers HP Sauce on baked beans a culinary high water mark, blurted ‘Well one things for certain, I won’t be eating any “burritas” or “tacas” or anything like that. I’ll be sticking to an “enchilado” or a “margarito”.’

Drummond recently put up posters of Jeremy Clarkson and Erika Eleniak. He kissed Clarkson tenderly on the mouth and sighed ‘There aren’t enough men in positions of power in the world’ 

image from pixabay