Monty Panesar puts new spin on his reason for leaving George Galloway's party

.

Rat denies controlling George Galloway from under his hat

The British Rodent Society has angrily denied claims that one of their members is controlling George Galloway’s speech from under his hat, like that rat in Ratatouille.

A spokesrat told us ‘Our members are furious about this. So he wears a hat and spouts pish and everybody assumes it’s because a rat is somehow working his vocal chords? Get real, bud’.

If Galloway’s hat doesn’t conceal a rodent then its function remains unclear. Perhaps it’s a theatrical prop like Churchill’s cigar or Che Guevera’s beret, although those two props had the good fortune to be attached to humans who commanded some respect. If hats could talk maybe we’d hear it squeaking out an SOS, begging to be relocated to a better person, but of course hats are mute. Unlike rats. And, sadly, very unlike George Galloway.

image from pixabay

Galloway: "We'll take seats from labour, providing they don't stand, obviously"

Workers' Party of Great Britain leader, and part time cat, George Galloway, has said that his party could take many seats from Labour, including that of Labour's deputy leader, Angela Rayner. "Of course, this is providing the Labour Party withdraw their candidates - that worked really well for me in Rochdale."

"Of course, what would be even better if is no other party stands against us but that is absolute cloud cuckoo land, so it's article one of our manifesto."  

image from pixabay