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Appropriating the Peace Chant, the water industry plans to pollute with impunity. Said a spokeswoman: 'We've no idea where Palestine is, or what they want, but they've got some great PR on avoiding plumbing.' An irrate Peace Protestor remarked: 'We're calling for end to Israeli tanks, not an end to septic tanks.'
The Metropolitan Police has issued a warning that such a phrase could inflame tensions between Southern Water and their shareholders. Despite this the water industry boasted that their proposed sewage spill will be the size of Gaza - but, despite the bombing, people in Gaza will have better access to clean water.
Said the spokeswoman: 'We shall pollute on the beaches, we shall pollute in the fields and in the streets; we shall never clean up.'
image from pixabay
The Israeli Donald Trump, Benjamin Netanyahu, has been accused of prank calling the 'How's My Driving?' number stuck on the back of lorries that are delivering humanitarian aid to Gaza.
As the phone rang yet again in her office, temp Amy Armstrong sighed and rolled her eyes 'Hello again Mr Netanyahu... No, I don't think those four lorries are deliberately forming the shape of a Swastika... we'd actually rather you didn't rain down the wrath of Abraham on our vehicles... well the lorries' sat navs are saying "from the river to the sea" because they’re having to rely on natural landmarks... well that's because you’ve bombed all the addresses in Gaza off Google Maps... Yes, well that is a lot of plagues isn't it... Alright then, well enjoy the humanitarian pause for reloading.'
Armstrong made herself a tea, before adding 'It makes a change from calls about tailgating on the M6.'
image from pixabay
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