A new paper released by researchers at The Department of Grant Maintenance at Nottingham University claims that walking can be beneficial for human health. The news is set to quash years of accepted ideas about the advantages of remaining sedentary until you have to lie down to sleep.
Walking, researchers discovered, can in turn help with activities such as walking. ‘Our data shows that the more a human walks the more they are able to walk,’ said one scientist from the group at Nottingham. ‘Let’s say a human being walks only 500 steps a day. We have discovered that by doubling that number, the person is actually able to walk for a 1,000 steps. By such means of calculation we were able to calculate that should a person add, say, 9,500 steps a day they would be walking 10,000 steps.’
The researcher, speaking from a structure that resembled a tower made of some form of hard, white, elephant-sourced material, spoke of the need for humans to not remain stiffly motionless all day every day. ‘Not getting out of bed is just not as healthy as we previously thought.’ But the scientist warned that there is a limit. Why? ‘Because there is a limit to everything except, it seems, the expansion of the universe.’ That, he added, is also good for human health due to the fact that a universe folding in on itself would eventually eviscerate all atoms. ‘And thus we wouldn’t be able to walk.’
Numerous past generations spoke of the benefits of ambulation on two legs and, before the invention of the motor car, would even walk to Tescos. Indeed, Tesco in Latin means ‘the store to which one must walk.’ And the motto of one of the legions deployed to Brittanicus in the second century AD was ‘Qui non ambulat est kunt.’
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