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Donald Trump knows that everyone loves a bad boy, so the USA is going double naughty.
American intelligence analysts have therefore listed the USA itself as part of the Axis of Evil. However, all American intelligence analysts are set to be fired after Elon Musk was too high on ketamine to remember how many Nazi salutes he had given.
One analyst sighed, 'Old Musky-pants could just have joined Fathers 4 Justice instead of this. He wears a leather jacket and is in his 50s, so he definitely has the vibe.'
Given the threat America poses to everyone, including America, Trump has ordered all major American cities that voted Democrat - which is essentially all of them - to be targeted by American nukes. That’s as long as Putin gives his permission.
Picture credit: Wix AI
The President has said he will also release clear evidence that the CIA killed JFK, MLK and the BBC. Opening these secret files will answer many mysteries, for instance did giants build the pyramids, was Jesus gay and who keeps commissioning Mrs Brown's Boys?
The JFK files alone have managed to place Lee Harvey Oswald in the book depository, next to his fellow conspirator Lord Lucan. Said an aide: 'We all know aliens abducted Madeleine McCann and that the Illuminati wrote all of Shakespeare's plays. But these files have also proven that the Moon Landings were fake, as no such Moon exists!'
In separate news Trump is under pressure to release the final books of Game of Thrones, which are under a 60 year embargo.
Image: ottielie - Pixabay
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