A rescue plane was forced to return to Khartoum today after a group of rowdy drunken Brits harassed fellow passengers, sang the national anthem while standing on seats, and punched a flight attendant. The Hercules transport had already been delayed because a passenger insisted on ‘nipping out’ for fags on learning the duty free shop had been shelled.
An RAF spokesperson said: ‘We can confirm that our Hercules transport made an emergency landing in a war zone because that was preferable to continuing with a cargo of Brits. They sang the tune to The Great Escape in front of German passengers and tried to open the doors at 30,000 feet.’
Ryanair has confirmed that a fleet of its planes have arrived in Khartoum to help with the rescue operation. Thousands who were fleeing the conflict have decided to stay and take their chances.