Political groupie and Brand Ambassador for vodka Nadine Dorries has decided to have ‘one last fling’ at becoming a Dame. Many thought her political career was over when she announced that she was leaving the House of Commons, though she bravely continued drawing the salary for a year so we wouldn’t feel abandoned.
Now she’s back, determined to share her political wisdom with the nation.
‘It’s a common problem among women who used to be quite fit’ said Dr Mathison of the University of Padgate. ‘Men hang on their every word because – well, I think we know why. Some women interpret lust as intellectual respect. Not easy to imagine that level of self unawareness, but that’s blondes for you. The tell is that she flicks her hair seductively when she says something she imagines to be intelligent. Real brainiacs don’t do that, I’m told – though I teach at the University of Padgate, so my exposure to brainiacs is largely theoretical’.
Will Nadine get her Damehood? Would you give her one? Will Nigel? Stay tuned for more emetic speculation
