Scenes of panic and fear gripped the White House, and the watching US public, as Donald Trump delivered a terrifying vision of the future, yesterday. After the press conference commenced, Mr Trump suddenly seemed to hover a foot above the floor whilst screaming then ripped off his suit jacket and shirt revealing the dark discolouring on his hand seeming to rapidly grow up his arm and across his body.
As this happened, he began, in his usual tone, 'witness pitiful mortals, and you really are pitiful, everyone is saying it, as I enter my final vengeful form. It's a fantastic form, some people are saying it's the best form they've ever witnessed. I may get nominated for a Nobel Final Form Prize, we don't know yet. But whatever happens, we're going to get you, you can't hide. I'm the best seeker. Now, the countdown to your firing begins."
With this he suddenly spouted leathery, blackened wings and, with a fiery flourish, smashed through the Press Room window and was last seen perched atop the Washington Monument eyeing Hispanic passers-by.
The US Vice President, JD Vance, said, 'as usual our President shows us the way forward. We will be introducing legislation soon to encourage everyone to reach their demonic final form or be deported to the desperate pits of hell….' The conference was then interrupted by hellish screams coming from Washington Plaza. The President's team made a speedy retreat to confer on next steps.
This is a breaking story, more soon….
Image credit: perchance.org
