Moving from a health care system run by communists, Mr. Trump promised to transform the NHS with a coup. A Trump spokeswoman explained: 'It is all agreed. Corbyn wins on the 12th. The CIA install a military junta on the 13th. And the NHS gets replaced by McNHS on the 14th.’
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Protestors in Bristol have hurled a statue of Edward Colston into the sea, which is a slightly more dignified exit than he gave the 19,000 slaves he is estimated to have killed. Unfortunately, due to the sheer number of racist monuments in Britain, disposing of them would turn the river Avon into a quarry.
In fact, the ratio of sculptures in the UK is predicted to be of 10% slave traders, with the remaining 90% are all concrete nudes of generic racists, from the House of Lords. Yet to delete the nation’s bigoted past, would mean erasing London, Glasgow and the whole back catalogue of ‘Little Britain’. One protestor explained: ‘We’re just focused on ancient racist millionaires, so Alan Sugar better watch out.’
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In a bold move, the President said he will support the clear success stories of 2020; this includes Poverty, War, plus Covid-20, the slimline Covid-21 and the i-Covid. More specifically, the $400m earmarked for the World Health Organisation will now go to help the spread of Covid-19, which is soon to become the USA’s major export.
Mr. Trump is convinced the Coronavirus can help kick-start the US economy, making it a world leader in deaths – a title previously held by the Pentagon. Rather than see the virus as the enemy, the President is convinced that the spread of a deadly infection can help Republicans – after all, it worked for Fox News. Meanwhile, the Coronavirus said it looked forward to partnership with Trump, describing it as a match made in heaven – which is probably where we will all end up.
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