Mary Magdalene: "Shit, He's buggered off!"

Winner: Sinnick

Runners-Up:

"As basement flats go I've seen worse - it does have natural daylight." (SirLupus);

"Another successful exploratory by the world's smallest proctologist." (FlashArry)

"So, From This Exact Location we Should now be Able to Book an Online GP Appointment."

Winner: DeskPilot

Runners-Up:

"And this is me after the whale spat me out." (DickEveryman);

"Coastguard advice is to avoid looking like Venezuelan fishermen." (Midfield Diamond).

Big Turnout for Charlie Kirk Resurrection.

Winner: DickEveryman

Runners-Up:

"World's tallest man gives speech." (MrQ);

"MAGA supporters told to look out for earthworms." (APepper).