Shergar Found Under Leicester Pub Car Park.

Winner: Dick Everyman

Runners-Up:

".. and I hope you enjoyed your visit as much as I did." (Sinnick);

"Harry couldn't get human skulls but his latest design was still keeping most cold callers out." (Doc Holiday)

Warning Issued to Ramblers Following Spate of Attacks by Feral Toddlers.

Winner: Dick Everyman

Runners-Up:

""Your last dad joke was even cornea than the one before."" (Modelmaker);

"CBBC presents 'Equus'." (Flash Arry)

Commentator Holds Press Conference to Explain that he's been Silenced.

Winner: APepper

Runners-Up:

""FFS Ken, you do not need all this crap to WhatsApp your mum."" (Flash Arry);

"Bike users notice increasingly elaborate schemes to block their cycle path." (Deskpilot)