In a move that has the football world in a spin, Gianni Infantino declared last night the remaining two week schedule of World Cup matches has been scrapped and that the trophy will be presented to Donald Trump who will receive it in part on behalf of the US team but really mostly for himself.
Infantino told the media: 'It will give me great pleasure to present the cup to President Trump, who as we all know, is the undisputed greatest world leader ever to have lived. He has worked so exceptionally hard for this well deserved victory. He told me this when he telephoned last night for the tenth time.'
Speaking to a sofa full of grovelling Fox so-called serious journalist at breakfast, Trump said. 'I'm glad FIFA has seen sense and righted what was a terrible wrong. One were the greatest footballing nation in the world, that's America by the way, was being expected to have to play more games before we got given the cup. This is a much better solution. And when I finally get the trophy awarded to me, next week in a big, beautiful and spectacular ceremony in the now concreted over Reflecting Pool, I already have a space planned for it among all the other grotesque tat I've dumped in the Oval Office.'
image from Grok
Why not join our WhatsApp channel, NewsBiscuit Daily Posts? You can access the latest output from NewsBiscuit and share posts easily with friends, family and colleagues using WhatsApp. Get some biscuits in your pocket (sorry about the crumbs, though) by clicking here.
