Brazil conducts Xorcism

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Govt. considers introducing 'Smokels'

'We have brothels because the public believes people having sex in public makes the place look untidy,' explained a government spokesman. 'And that is despite the fact that passive sex has not (as far as we are aware) ever been established to be a health hazard.'

'Smokels will be far more useful, and will enable those who are absolutely desperate for a ciggie to engage in their perverted activity in seclusion, with no risk of buggering up the lungs of the horses.'

'We also hope it will reduce the public nuisance of dodgy characters leaning against lamp-posts and discreetly muttering "'Ello, Dearie, fancy a ciggie?" to passers-by, before disappearing up a nearby alleyway with a punter seeking a quick drag on her fag.'

Photo by Reza Mehrad on Unsplash

Starmer haunted by images of Margaret Thatcher on his toast

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