One man explained: ‘I wasn’t excited by the effort involved in gaining a Beckham six-pack but I’m happy to imitate his drinking habits and clothing range. I can now be a metro-sexual while sitting intoxicated in front of the TV, reeking of Homme. True, those eye-wateringly tight boxer shorts will now get snugger, as my whiskey belly pops over the rim. And I’m not sure lying in a pool of your own vomit, pants wedged up my arse crack can be described as personal grooming’.
Prince Charles is under increasing scrutiny today after the Sunday Times revealed that one of his charities accepted a million pound donation from the Galactic Empire.
A spokesman for the prince has said that the million pound donation, which was made a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away, had been through all the appropriate checks and that it was made after Darth Vader became a ghost in Return of the Jedi.
A treasurer within the fund also said the donation was agreed “wholly” by the five trustees at the time, and “any attempt to suggest otherwise most likely the result of influence from the dark-side of the force.”
