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Following reports that NASA have 'got around to updating' its Mars Rover operating system, only 18 years since the last update, tech experts in the NHS have considered following suit. 'We knew our Windows 98 software was in need of an update and felt the systems were in danger of being hacked by Nigerian fraudsters,' said a NASA spokesman today, 'so we uploaded the 2004 April patch. It took hours, not because Mars is so far away, but because, well, it's Windows.'
IT experts working for the NHS have concluded that such an update is possible. 'If we update the central server to a Pentium and fit a CD drive we might be able to load Windows 95,' said one expert, musing if the updated spec would be compatible with the industry standard Spectrum computers. 'We might even consider fitting monitors as well, given the ticker-tape machines are wearing out a bit,' he added.
Depending on when you read this, the happy couple are now consciously coupling, re-coupling, de-coupling or unconsciously pickling. They may have even combined with other Hollywood stars - Jennifer Lawrence, Benedict Cumberbatch and Johnny Depp - forming 'JenniBenniJonniBrangelina', a five-headed uber-star.
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