US government tells Trump haters where he will be buried
"Since President Trump is turning 80 this year, we thought it appropriate to reveal where his burial site will be," said a spokes-crypt for the Federal Cemeteries Commission. "That is so people can exercise their First Amendment right, in the eventuality of Trump's death, to spit on his grave. "The location is the Strait of Hormuz Garden of Rest in Utterloosa, Florida - specially renamed to commemorate the place where his political career met its end. "Insulting the remains o
Trump shoots himself in the bonespurs
Donald Trump is undergoing emergency surgery in Bethesda Naval Hospital in Maryland, having shot himself in the bonespurs in his feet. "This is a common injury amongst Vietnam War draft dodgers like President Trump who suddenly get very brave later in life and start shooting off missiles at Iran," said a Bethesda hospital podiatrist. "In doing so, they deliver a high velocity bullet at close range right into their goofy, bone-spurred foot. "They also look like prize chumps be
