Millions flee toxic fall-out from Trump's sickening bragging
Roads out of cities across the Western world are now packed with people desperate to escape the noxious effects of Trump's incessant self-congratulation. "They're seeking anywhere, way up in the hills or out at sea, with no WiFi connection and no TV or radio signals," said an AA spokes-spare tyre, "so they don't have to listen to Trump's nauseating boasts about 'winning on levels never seen before'." "We stuck with the news for as long as we could," said one evacuee on the A3
Josef Fritzl to stand as a Reform UK MP
Rumours abound that Josef Fritzl, the convicted rapist and Vincent Price lookalike, who fathered seven children by his own daughter, could stand for Reform UK at the next election. A spokesman for Reform told Newsbiscuit, "Mr Fritzl is currently in a prison for ‘mentally abnormal’ inmates, so sounds incredibly well qualified to represent our party in Parliament." "Despite the fact that he is Austrian, it is understood that Fritzl is considering applying for UK citizenship and
