In a move considered surprising by many industry observers, BP have today announced their appointment of renowned super hero and eco champion The Toxic Avenger as their new CEO. 'Toxie' joins the multinational corporation after an eventful career fighting crime, which began at the age of sixteen when he was dumped into a vat of toxic chemicals by a gang of thugs.
Speaking at a hastily arrange press conference earlier today, the hideously mutated super hero said "I'm delighted to be joining BP and look forward to leading the company through this period of change and transition. In addition to coordinating our clean up operations in the gulf and ensuring full support from our board of directors, I hope to bring my own experience to bear by single handedly fighting the giant mutant sea creatures that will surely start climbing ashore on the beaches of Mexico any day now".
The sombre atmosphere was alleviated briefly when, responding to journalist Derek Jones's question of how he intends to deal with the leak, Toxie began outlining his twelve point plan of co-ordinated relief efforts before Mr. Jones clarified that he was actually referring to the leak of radioactive ooze that had begun to seep from an weeping pustule on the CEO's face, flowing over his Armani suit, and gathering in a pool on the floor.
Shortly after the press conference, Toxie, together with journalists from the world's press, flew to a beach on the northern Gulf coast for a photo opportunity that saw him pose with his trademark mop, attempting to clean up the spill whilst occasionally swigging large mouthfuls of the oil and screaming 'Ahhhhh, glorious, glorious, sludge, aaaaaaaaa'.
Reports say that Toxie was tempted to join the oil giant by a package that included several thousand barrels of radioactive sludge per annum and a palatial 16 acre swamp lair just outside The Hamptons.
In an ironic twist, BP's outgoing Chief Executive has been offered a senior position on the international executive board of Super Villains. The multinational evil organisation, whose members include Doctor Doom, The Joker and billionaire Lex Luthor, said in a statement released today that "the destruction of hundred of miles of coastline and wreaking of untold damage to the planet's ecosystem are impressive achievements for any super villain to have on their CV. We look forward to working with this man who shall henceforth be known as Doctor Slick, on a range of evil schemes and apocalyptic endeavours".