Nick Clegg, taking part in a BBC documentary about the General Election last May, has revealed that he 'still has no idea' what a coalition government is or what he is supposed to be doing, but that he is 'thoroughly enjoying all the fussing and attention' and is loving 'barking loudly at every opportunity'.
Speaking to BBC political editor Nick Robinson, Clegg said that he had 'very little input' into the five days of negotiating between the Liberal Democrat and Conservative parties, having been locked in the back yard by David Cameron after urinating on a potted plant, and that being appointed Deputy PM was 'a massive surprise'. He also makes a claim set to shock his party members: 'I just do what David tells me to'.
Former Lib Dem leader Sir Menzies Campbell, also taking part in the documentary, has revealed that the 'enormous chemistry' in the Clegg-Cameron relationship is mostly down to Mr Cameron's training regime. He says that Cameron's 'firm voice and steady eye contact' have transformed a formerly-unruly Clegg, affectionately known by Cameron as 'Deputy Dawg', but that he still fails to roll over on command without the use of a choke-chain.
Nick Robinson says that making the documentary, which looks at the negotiations and deal-making between the parties, was an 'interesting experience', but that he is still troubled with nightmares after interviewing David Cameron. 'I think I've been permanently affected after witnessing all that face-licking and nuzzling,' said Robinson. 'Watching Cameron struggling to control an excitable Clegg was very traumatic, but the vivid dreams are the worst part - I keep having flashbacks to the moment that Clegg started humping my leg.'