Trump: I am James Bond
With the revelation that Trump was a CIA asset, he now claims to be a MI6 agent operating at the highest level. 'The President grabbed...
Melania rounded up by ICE agents
In a surprise move, ICE agents have raided President Trump’s compound in Mar-a-Lago and led away his third wife Melania in handcuffs. 'A...
Trump throws a sickie
The White House has published a note, apparently written by the President's mum, keeping Trump off work for another day. 'Donald has a...
Labour to rename Asylum Seeking as Emergency Holibobs
A Labour spokesperson today has announced plans for the renaming of the process of seeking asylum as 'Emergency Holibobs' and of asylum...
Panic as Trump says he's entering his 'Final Form'
Scenes of panic and fear gripped the White House, and the watching US public, as Donald Trump delivered a terrifying vision of the...
Bond comes out of retirement to warn Rachel Reeves
A smartly dressed man ordered a martini for Rachel Reeves, asking it to be not stirred, but very shaken. ‘The name’s Bonds. Government...
New Angela 'Three Pads' Rayner version of Monopoly launched
Hasbeen, manufacturer of the classic property trading board game Monopoly, has decided to base a special edition on the antics of Deputy...
Aunty Angela's Stamp Payment Error
Noah Thomkinson, now aged six years and four days, was in tears yesterday when an eagerly-anticipated sixth birthday card from his Aunty...
Tories pledge to get all the sauce out of ketchup bottles
The Tories are proposing a 'maximum extraction strategy' for ketchup and sauce bottles. New legislation will require sauce bottles to...
Netanyahu to offer small boats to the people of Gaza
Benjamin Netanyahu plans to offer small boats to the people of Gaza, and of the West Bank, so that they can go to ... well, anywhere they...