David Cameron and Nick Clegg today ripped off their clothes during Prime Minister's Question Time and fucked each other there and then in a desperate attempt to distract the country from a crippling deficit, tax cuts for corporations, tax increases on spending, and sweeping cuts in public expenditure rolling back decades of progress made in forcing the government to pay for things that the corporations they support have no interest in providing.
To loud cheers from both sides of the house the two party leaders began by fucking each other on the green carpet of the house, then went on to do it doggy style over their seats. In a surprise move that will continue to create column inches for months to come, it was Clegg who took Cameron from behind. The expression of pleasure on Cameron's face as this took place prompted many calls of 'Hyah hyah' from the back benches. MPs awarded marks as they watched for Style, Passion, Stamina and Finishing.
The speaker was content to let the performance continue, though when Clegg picked up the mace and fetched Cameron a few whacks on the posterior he did cry “Steady on now!”. Some have pointed out that his tone conveyed enthusiasm for the sight rather than genuine disapproval.
The performance finished in a rousing fashion when Clegg withdrew from Cameron, turned him around and came in his face. The spectacle earned a standing ovation that lasted several minutes longer than that for any parliamentary speech of the last twenty years.
Cameron was quoted afterwards as saying, “It was a good Question Time. I've been wanting people to see what me and Nick can really do ever since we got into power. And no one asked anything about the privatisation of the NHS.” The division after the session suggested that Clegg had got the best of the exchange but Cameron was also said to be 'content' with the outcome.