After an intense eight-hour meeting between President Obama and David Cameron, White House spokesman Rich Jefferson confirmed that the pair are on the verge of discussing the thorny issues of the Lockerbie Bomber and the Gulf oil leak.
‘The meeting started well with Mr Cameron congratulating the president on his choice of carpet and wallpaper in the oval office, and the president responded by noting his admiration for Mr Cameron’s new silk tie’ continued Jefferson ‘By which time they were joined by the first lady and Mrs Cameron for a photo opportunity followed by a state lunch.’
‘The afternoon session was very productive with both leaders agreeing on the policies towards Afghanistan and Iraq, followed by swift condemnation of North Korea, a restatement of free-market principles, condemnation of greedy bankers and reiteration of their great admiration of the special relationship between the two counties.’
‘Afternoon tea was a great success’ confirmed Jefferson ’As both leaders sat down to watch recorded coverage of Lance Armstrong’s progress in his last Tour de France, and the afternoon concluded with a guided tour of the White House and its grounds.’
‘The evening state banquet was one of the finest held so far with a rich variety of indigenous food consumed including french onion soup, fillet mignon and black forest gateau and the evening concluded with speeches from both the president and Mr Cameron which again confirmed the great friendship and trust between the two nations.’
A private meeting between the two men followed during which some post-dinner fun was enjoyed. Jefferson denied rumours that staff and reporters had heard the sound of very loud footsteps followed by a tipsy Mr Cameron shouting 'Merkel' and then the noise of a falling ladder followed by the sound of an equally tipsy president shouting 'Sarkozy' followed by hilarious laughter.
With only one hour of meetings left to be held tomorrow morning Jefferson reiterated the fact that the ‘Difficult issues would definitely be covered, but if the buffet breakfast were to over-run or the alarm clock is on-the-blink the president has given me a note to hide in Mr Cameron’s suitcase, but it's not as long as the one Mr Cameron has asked me to slip into the president's desk drawer after his flight has left.'