The Government has come under fire after announcing it was to replace 3,000 public sector staff with woodland creatures.
Ministers claim the cost cutting measure is necessary and will save the public purse pounds. The savings will be made through a reduction in the amount paid out in salaries as the animals are happy to work for the occasional biscuit.
Government work and livestock Minister Lord Graham said, 'We're all having to tighten our belts at the moment and everyone has to chip in to try and get Britain back in black. We spend hundreds of thousands on upkeep of our woodlands - it seems only fair that we should get a return on that investment'.
One senior doctor has already called the proposal ludicrous and criticised trials that have already been undertaken.
Professor Duncan of The Royal Hospital Trust said, "Have you ever seen a toad try to drive an ambulance? It can't grab the wheel or operate the pedals. They had to build extra small ambulances which were useless because the only patients we could get in the back were other toads.
"Whilst local councils reported an increase in productivity after all middle managers were replaced with does I don't think I need to mention what happened when we tried to replace nursery nurses with foxes."
However animal charities were surprisingly in favour of the move despite accusations of slave labour. A RSPCA spokesman said "Frankly when it's a choice between a badger cull or badgers being responsible for running the IT support desk at Hull City Council we're going to have to choose IT support desk every time."
There have been some reports of altercations after a Whitehall mandarin from the Ministry of Justice returned from a weekend shooting game in Scotland to find a Grey Partridge had been named new Permanent Undersecretary.