Guests at the party of three-year-old Isabel Rose Alexander, daughter of Chief Secretary to the Treasury Danny Alexander, were up in arms yesterday after a raft of emergency budgetary measures were announced hours before the event. ‘I suppose none of us were really surprised when he announced that half the guest list had been cut,’ said Alison Mason, whose daughter Lily was allowed to remain at the party on the condition she increased her My Little Pony present by 2.5 per cent. ‘But we all felt it was a bit rich when he defended it by saying that he was only combating the previous party’s legacy of excess. Maisy Thompson only had a face-painter for Christ’s sake.’
While the party tea was an austere affair, with the biggest cuts found in chocolate fingers and iced fondants, there was an unexpected boon for anyone eating carrot sticks, whose entitlement was increased 15 per cent and doubled for those from lone-parent families. But Mrs Alexander flirted with controversy amongst her fellow mothers when she announced that all party food would be frozen for the next three years.
As the Alexanders claimed their party was ‘fair and progressive’, other parents at the party were unimpressed. ‘The bouncy castle seemed like a nice touch,’ said Dave Thompson, whose son Ryan was told that as a second child, he no longer qualified for a party bag. ‘But when my kids were evicted from castle on the basis that they hadn’t actively sought work in the previous 12 months, I was livid. No parent wants to see their child bouncing around on an inflatable one-bed council flat.’