Francis Maude is now to be known as Maude Francis, Theresa May will be Mother Theresa and Jeremy Hunt will be Jeremy Cunt.
“I hope this will silence, once and for all, misguided Labour accusations that I just surround myself with sycophantic male ex-public schoolboys.”
“Now I want to move forward and make Britain great again” he added, before checking his makeup and nearly overbalancing on a pair of red stilettos.
“It’s a start” said Harriet Harman “but it doesn’t go far enough”
“Typical woman” said Dave “give her an inch and she wants 9 more.”
Benny Hill and Bob Monkhouse were unavailable for comment.